11 things only Canberrans understand

People come here for a year. Two maximum.

How many of you (from somewhere else) swore you’d give Canberra two years and then you’d move back home to Sydney, Melbourne or regional NSW? And then, let me guess, without even realising it, this place became home. And you wanted to stay. Because it’s so easy here. And the bush is right there. The moment you make that decision to stay, you become a true Canberran.

Half of our working population gets paid on the same day.

Do not, I repeat do not, head to Canberra Centre on your lunch break on public service payday. It’s the day half of Canberra is cashed up and willing to buy lunch or splurge on a set of Country Road tea towels.

The food delivery apps must get a massive workout that night too (imagine the data analysts at Uber wondering why half of Canberra orders butter chicken and garlic naans on the same night), and the morning teas at work are loaded with all the expensive stuff like pastries from Flute.

The best choc tops are at Dendy.

They literally employ people to make them by hand. Outrageous. Macadamia for me please.

The oldies party at 88mph and the kids go to Mooseheads.

You’ll never run into your teenager on a night out as long as you stick to the rules: mum and all her friends stick to the flashing dance floor at 88 while the kids do tequila shots at upstairs Moose. What the young ones seem to forget, though, is that mum and her friends once dominated the dance floor at Moose (old Moose that is, the version before it burnt down) to such classic tunes as The Macarena, Coco Jumbo and Rhythm of the Night. Cop that.

When you spot Black Mountain Tower, you know you’re home.

Whether you’re coming back from a three-day bender at a festival in Sydney or from a long weekend at the coast on a Sunday night, when you see that tower you know you’re back where you belong. And that your nice warm comfy bed is not far away.

‘Just park at the Target car park.’

There’s no longer a Target in Civic, but this carpark will always be known for the retail experience that existed underneath it.

The Civic merry–go-round came from St Kilda.

The historic merry-go-round has been a Canberra icon since 1974 — but it’s actually been delighting kids for more than a century. Designer and builder Herbert Thomson of Armadale, Victoria, created the carousel in 1913.

The massive organ, 52 hand-carved wooden horses and two hand-carved elephants were imported from Germany, while the twisted brass upright poles were made in Scotland. It was a much-loved ride on the St. Kilda esplanade for 60 years before being sold at auction to the residents of Canberra for $40,000.

We go for Queensland in the State of Origin.

Never mind the fact we’re completely surrounded by NSW, when it comes to this rugby league grudge match, we go for the Queenslanders. Because who wants to see a Queanbeyan colleague gloating around the office after a Blues win? Not us.

From mid-December to the end of January, we become a ghost town.

The legend goes that Canberrans officially turn on the ‘out of office’ email around 15 December, and don’t return until the first week of school the following year. Broulee, Narawallee and Tuross are the destinations of choice, and rumour has it the population of Batemans Bay surges from 17,000 to 35,000 over the summer months.

You don’t swim at Pine Island.

It’s where the less-than-desirables go to drink and there’s broken glass everywhere. (This is, in fact, completely false. As a frequent swimmer at Pine Island, I read my book on the sandy shores under the pine trees and my kids love exploring the giant rocks in the water. It’s awesome. There are lots of teens there but also lots of families.)

Driving to the coast isn’t the same with a pie from the Braidwood Bakery.

Or a sausage roll. Or an apple turnover with cream. And a Dare Iced Coffee to wash it all down.